I’ve Got The Hippy Shakes
How many imaginary coronavirus symptoms do you have?
You wake up in the morning. There’s something catching in your throat. You clear it, but wonder. Is that a cough? Is this a symptom? Is this how it begins? Is it my turn for the coroanvirus?
How many of you are neurotic about your health? How often do you feel a slight twinge somewhere on your body and immediately head off to Google to check it out? I admit I do that? I’m the type that has a leg cramp and then goes to my doctor to tell him that I have advanced heart disease. If you’re anything close to that, this coronavirus pandemic must have you calling your therapist multiple times each day.
Here’s my story of paranoia. Maybe you can relate, maybe not. Maybe it’ll help you feel better, probably not.
I actually do have one of the symptoms. I have the dreaded dry cough. The good news is it started towards the end of last year, before the virus scare began. The not so good news is me and my doc have tried everything to get rid of it. I’ve been through two inhalers and some pills that did nothing. Next he told me that sometimes it takes more than six weeks for the cough to go away. Not all that reassuring. Finally, they gave me some prescription cough medicine with codeine that seems to doing the job. The cough is still there, but getting better.
The major problem with having a cough is the looks you get from other people. A month ago I walked into a grocery and started coughing. The dude entering with me took about five steps backwards like he was doing his best Michael Jackson imitation. A week later I saw people staring me down at the airport. Imagine how scared you would be getting on an airplane and sitting near someone coughing?
And yet, that’s not the stuff that is freaking me out. That’s real and being controlled. It’s the ones going through my brain that are doing that job.
I feel my head at least ten times a day. About half the time it feels normal. It’s the other times that drive my insanity. It feels like I’m burning up….or at least have a temperature of 100 degrees. I have no idea which one is true. We don’t have a thermometer. All the stores are out of them. We did order one on Amazon. The delivery is scheduled for some time in May. Apparently I’m not the only one with an imaginary fever.
Next comes the chills. It doesn’t matter when I’m taking one of my walks around the neighborhood, they’re still chills, right?
Finally, my throat does feel a little sore. I’m having a bit of a problem swallowing liquids. A few days ago, I downed some chloraseptic spray. I didn’t both with the spray attachment. I just downed a couple of swigs. It didn’t help with my imaginary throat issue, but it did help me sleep better….much better. Who knew alcohol was one of the main ingredients?
So, can you relate to this? Is this helping? Does this make you feel better, or at least not so alone with your emotions? You’re welcome.
I would go on with a few more maybe imaginary symptoms, but I think you get the point. Besides, I feel a little headache coming on. Hmmm…is that one of the symptoms? I think I may need a lay down for a nap.
Related Post: It’s time to call it the #TrumpVirus
Type your email address in the box and click the “create subscription” button. My list is completely spam free, and you can opt out at any time.
-
Advertisement:
-
Advertisement:
-
Welcome to ChicagoNow.
-
Meet The Blogger
Howard Moore
My so called friends think it’s time to edit this section. After four years, they may be right, but don’t tell them that. I’ll deny it until they die!
I can’t believe I’ve been writing this blog for four years.
It started as a health/wellness thing and over the years has morphed to include so many things that I don’t know how to describe it anymore.
I really thought this was going to be the final year of the blog but then Donald Trump came along. It looks like we’re good for four more years..God help us all!
Oh yeah…the biographical stuff. I’m not 60 anymore. The rest you can read about in the blog. -
Subscribe by Email
Completely spam free, opt out any time.
Tags
- Donald Trump (122)
- Parkinson”s Disease (50)
- Chicago Cubs (28)
- Cancer (22)
- Paul McCartney (21)
- John Lennon (21)
- Melanoma (19)
- Bob Dylan (15)
- Linda Ronstadt (15)
- The Beatles (15)
Categories
- Music (288)
- Wellness (243)
- Health (174)
- Parkinsons (148)
- News (148)
- Uncategorized (143)
- Satire (127)
- humor (117)
- Pop Music (101)
- Sports (86)
Latest on ChicagoNow
-
Mom is tougher than we thought
from Retired in Chicago by Marianne Goss
posted today at 11:29 am -
Klondike Road Trip Part 6: Bear Down, Alaskan Bears
from Court’s Excellent Adventures by Abeona Adiona
posted today at 11:18 am -
Ty Hair & Emma Rose Hair Care
-
‘Trump has blood on his hands’
from The Barbershop: Dennis Byrne, Proprietor by Dennis Byrne
posted today at 9:50 am -
Dude — Petraits Rescue
from Pets in need of homes by ChicagoNow Staff
posted today at 8:54 am
Posts from related blogs
-
Spiritual and Physical Wellness
Most recent post: Give Your Immune System a Boost
-
Health Care Mythologies
Most recent post: The Post From The End of The World
-
Say What?
Most recent post: Don’t Panic If Your Hearing Aids Fail You
More from Lifestyle: Wellness
Read these ChicagoNow blogs
-
Cubs Den
Chicago Cubs news and comprehensive blog, featuring old school baseball writing combined with the latest statistical trends -
Pets in need of homes
Pets available for adoption in the Chicago area -
Hammervision
It’s like the couch potato version of Mr. and Mrs. Smith.
Read these ChicagoNow Bloggers
-
Kerri K. Morris
from Cancer Is Not A Gift: -
Julia Passamani
-
Jake Perper
from Bears Backer:
- About ChicagoNow
- •
- FAQs
- •
- Advertise
- •
- Recent posts RSS
- •
- Privacy policy (Updated)
- •
- Comment policy
- •
- Terms of service
- •
- Chicago Tribune Archives
- •
- Chicago Internet Marketing Services
©2020 CTMG – A Chicago Tribune website –
Crafted by the News Apps team